At some point it was apparent that we were watching peoples lives on earth and their situations instantly and simultaneously. I remember seeing a man that loved one women very much, but he lost her, and they were separated for the rest of their lives because he didn't show her that he loved her enough and she wouldn't return to him because she love him and thought that he loved another so she never returned! She was His last thought when he prayed on his death bed and he hers.

I disagreed with the situation, and thought that they really purely loved each other so they should not be separated. I asked the "Pink Cloud" not to let that happen and the next thing I knew I was being ask what do I want to be rich; poor; a woman; a man; strong; weak etcetera.. Then I was in the tunnel of being born.

When I was born I looked at people and wondered why they can't talk to me like the cloud did or understand my thoughts or communicate with me. I have had the thought that I am in this life to live out in what the "Pink Cloud" might consider a slower pace so that I might understand the situation we were observing from Heaven, but now I know that It was so that I could choose to be him and show her that I loved her. I could have chosen to be her returning to him so that we don't loose each other but, I think I chose him because to be her wouldn't work out because she wouldn't have the purity of the love shown that kept her away for a life time. But certainly he could show more love vs. keeping it inside. Since there is an eternal time to explain things to me this is one way of doing it I guess. Making me live the life up close to get a greater feeling or insight of it.

I also have an understanding of what God is to me. God is everything you see and feel and taste, he is the past and future from the start to the end and more. I remember the beginning when all was dark and then the realization of existing beyond all the darkness followed by the light and creation of all things. It is almost the same feeling when you shut your eyes but you know you're there looking at the darkness, and then you start creating a dream but with God it's real creation not a dream. I feel I can speak with God and he hears me and guides me as a teacher of all things. Certainly, he has let me know he is not only real but always here and everywhere. God can speak to us as a gentle breeze or a lightning bolt.

I think when you disagree with a situation unfolding God isn't mad at you. In living the life I watched from the "Pink cloud" I think God might be answering my prayer to not part the man an woman because God knew I was moved by the love between them and put the spirit of that articulate love in that man we saw. I can't prove any of this but I guess that is where my faith in God knows that he can put the spirit of love in all of us and it is that spirit born from the heart of God that moves us. Anyways, that was my memory before birth and a little of life.

Troy

October 17, 2006